Just a few Life Lessons.

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On the porch this morning, I stared at the blank pages of my journal. Tons of thoughts swirling around in my head, none of them coherent enough to put on paper. It’s been like this for months. Like a drain clogged with frustration, anger, questions. Searching for the peace that passes all understanding and finding a big fat glob of confusion.

Today I’ve decided to take captive those brain cloggers and dump them behind me and just move forward. Easier said than done?

Tomorrow Russell, Shawn, and I head to Radford. So excited to see The Girl after three months of hell Summer. Just fyi…it is nasty and humid on The Porch again as I am writing this and I realized that this weather has been contributing to my ugly state of mind. Like how ridiculous to give the weather…or a season…that much power!

So we move Brett into his new teeny weeny one bedroom apartment tomorrow. He had enough of roommates for three years and this last year was a doozie. What kind of person removes his name from the utilities so he doesn’t have to pay them while he lives there? Now they all lose out on their apartment deposit to pay the utilities and Brett wasn’t even there the last four months that the utilities weren’t paid.

Life lessons. A momma’s outrage doesn’t override the life lesson of some people. Thankfully, most people aren’t like that loser guy.

Life lessons. Deciding to move forward when you just want to stick around and fight a losing battle. Coming to the realization that people aren’t always going to act the way you would act. Accepting that there are times that people, even family, aren’t going to give you what you need or want and sometimes, will just decide to dislike you or hate you without reason. (If this rings familiar with a few of you that I have been talking with/texting with the last two days…I’m looking at you AND me.)

Life lessons. Learning to forgive the unforgiveable. Stepping around the mess instead of wading through and getting pulled into the muck. Choosing to turn away for the sake of peace and love, instead of fighting back. Focusing on the good things, the good people, the good times, the goodness and letting all of the other bs go.

Learning from the people purposely placed in your life. Seeking and accepting and implementing their wise and experienced counsel.

Not to allow yourself to be a doormat for people and their junk. But to be adult enough to just move on. Realizing that what goes around, comes around. Not for the sake of retaliation and revenge, but because that is just how life works.

And while I began this laundry list of life lessons with Brett in mind, really…it is a note to self.

Blessings.

 

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Good Golly!

It has been 17 days since I posted a comment! I have been busy reading everyone else’s blogs, posting my own comments to them, but the thought never crossed my flighty little head to post on my own blog!

(long sigh)

I’m afraid this is just the beginning.

You see, I am a mother experiencing her first child going into his

SENIOR YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL.

Man, is there a ton of baggage that comes with THAT realization! Here is a sampling of my thought process lately…

The obvious/clicheiest…

WHERE DID THE TIME GO?????

And then…

Have we done our job in raising him to love Jesus and put Him first? I believe we have. Have we taught him that the only other thing you can count on AFTER Jesus is your family. I know that he knows it.

Have we instilled in him a good work ethic. LOL. Well, he loves to work. But school doesn’t fall into the category of “work”. Volunteering does. Helping others does. Working at the bike shop does. Mowing lawns for our single, woman neighbor does. So…I guess we pretty much did okay there.

Have we taught him to be a leader and not a follower among his peers? Definitely. He has never been one to follow the latest fads or to follow his peers into (real) trouble. One of the main reasons he is hoping to get into CNU is because of the President’s Leadership Program.

As I’ve worked through all of these things, I am actually becoming excited at the thought of going through this time with him. I plan to take a ton of photos, and spend as much time with him as he will allow me to! He’s pushed away from us (and by us I mean his dad) which has absolutely KILLED The Man. Even as he has recognized that it HAS to be this way, is SUPPOSED to be this way…it’s still hard for The Man to swallow. But never has The Boy pushed US away…he’s just pushed away a bit to allow some room. Some freedom. Some space to expand who he is. It’s pretty cool.

I’m excited to go through this first real step into adulthood. Getting into college. He’s already been accepted to LU. But his first choice is CNU. Marshall was deemed too far by his trying-not-to-cling mom.

The Boy and His Clingy Mom
Germany, 2003

And he has, surprisingly, agreed.

So, I imagine that this next year is going to race by. The end of July is upon us. Volleyball camp starts Monday for My Girl. Football camp for The Little Boy. In two weeks The Boy heads to Colorado with his Best Bud to spend two weeks in the mountains…fishing, riding ATV’s, hiking, repelling. Doing all of the things that FREAK ME OUT because I’m not there to “protect him”. Please, Jesus, watch over The Boy and his Best Bud. They belong to You. Please protect them. Amen.


The Boy and Best Bud

Once The Boy returns from Colorado, he’ll meet with his yearbook team (he’s Senior Editor), get his wisdom teeth out and his Senior Year will begin.

I’ve already asked The Girls to give me some grace…I’m The Connector. The one who keeps us connected, in touch, and informed about each other’s lives. I may need some connecting myself. But it’s okay, it’s just one year.

Unless I start thinking about The Boy’s sister, My Girl, who is exactly 11 months and 1 day younger than him…