When I held him in my arms the very first time, it is true that I wasn’t exactly wondering if he would one day become a NFL player, rocket scientist, lead in a rock band or the next JFK. Mostly because his father was whooping it up with the doctor that we were all wrong and it IS A BOY and I was barely able to focus on our newborn because I was so distracted by My Man’s pure and loud joy. Turns out, The Big Boy lives for baseball, loves history, camo and country music and is, decidedly, a conservative Republican.
But, I think it is safe to say that we all have, if not dreams, hopes for our children as they grow. We hope they will do well in school. We hope they will be good and kind. We hope they will embrace our morals, values and religion. We hope they will stay out of trouble. Nothing wrong with any of that.
Sometimes, though, our hopes become pressure; even obsession. We focus on what we want for our child. Not necessarily what they want. The pressure to make certain grades; take specific classes. Excel in everything they put their hand to.
When they fall short, and they will at some point, we might be disappointed, frustrated. Angry, even. We have lost sight of the big picture. We need to go back to our basic hopes for our child. It is often difficult to let go of our plans for our children as they mature. But, we must.
I confess that I have had to do some letting go with each of our three children. Whether by their own choices, circumstances or injury, some of my dreams and plans for my three darlings have been totally busted. This last year especially, I have forced myself to step back; see the big picture.
And you know what? I like what I see. Giving attention to the detail, the heart of each of them, they are good and kind and compassionate. They love Jesus. They love serving and helping others less fortunate than they. They have, or will be continuing their education in fields of their choosing.
The outside wrapping may not all be what I wanted or expected or, dare I say, even hoped. But I can see now that it is going to be something even better.
Love you guys.