On Being 47.

Four decades plus seven
Married twenty-five years
(not sure which shocks me more…the age or the years married)
hanging on to this extra weight
desperately seeking organization
scared I will never find it
wanting to live intentionally
to live with intent
with purpose
with focus
to love
to bless
mother of three
living with less fear
wanting to live with no fear
living with more faith
wanting to live with complete faith
beloved of God


My Baby Boy is 12.

Twelve! I can not believe it.

I so remember the joy and giddiness of finding out (after one whole month of trying) that I was pregnant with you. Your dad…well…shock is a better word. He thought he would have more time to get used to the idea of maybe having a third child. Five years after our second child and 6 years after our first. Shock. Pretty sums up his reaction. At first. But don’t think he wasn’t overjoyed. He was. That Man loves his kids.

Pregnancy with you was a dream. Easy. Little tummy trouble. Little pre-term labor. I. Felt. Good. Six hours labor and delivery from start to finish. And the joy of having you the day before my birthday. No one could ask for a better 35th birthday than I had! The entire wing was empty. My bff, Beth, was working the desk and keeping the over-zealous 22 year old nurse out of my face. Life. Was Sweet.

Well, except for the screaming. You came out screaming. You screamed for three years. After three years, you stopped. Coincidentally when your dad left for the War College in Rhode Island and we stayed here. You really just wanted to sleep next to your momma at night. And so you did while dad was gone. Shhh. Don’t tell him.

You were an early walker and an early talker. By 14 months you were putting words together. By 18 months you were speaking in sentences. We, and your pediatrician, were floored. You were also the one we couldn’t leave alone. For a second. Only you have had to have stiches. Only you have had to have x-rays for possible broken bones. You are our best, all-around athlete. We know that if you choose to, you could easily letter in three sports in high school. But football and basketball are your passions.
You are already as tall as I am. If not a bit taller.

You hate math. Hate, hate, hate it. And it shows in your grades, unfortunately. But you promise to do better. I totally believe you.

You switch back and forth between the following life-time professions: West Point Military Academy so that you can invent and/or improve weapons. Or University of Miami to play football. I’m not sure which one scares me more.

You have an amazing singing voice. You loved taking piano lessons. But you hated to practice.

This is your last year in elementary school. We have had a child at your elementary school for 13 consecutive years. I’m not so sure they won’t be happy to see the last of us!

I love that you still sneak a hug and a smooch from me. I hope you always will.

Interview with a twelve-year-old:

So, today is your birthday. Did you wake up thinking about it? No. I didn’t even know it was my birthday because I’ve been sick for awhile.

What do you want for your birthday? A cell phone.

Think you’re going to get it? Maybe.
(he’s not)

Who do you like better…me or dad? laughing…I can’t choose.
Why not? cuz you’re both so awesome.
(safe answer)

What do you want to be when you grow up? Pro football player.
Will you say, “hi mom” when you’re on camera at the super bowl? yeah.
What team do you want to play for? Redskins.
What kind of car do you want? 1971 Black Corvette, Sting Ray
Can I drive it? yes.
Can I have it? no.

How many children do you want to have? Three.
Boys or girls? Mix
What’s your favorite tv show? Spongebob.

Who do you like better…Lucy or Philip? Sigh. Philip.

Is it because you’re afraid he’ll beat you up if you don’t say him? No, because he’s my same gender.
What is gender? Like male or female.
Just checking.
What’s your favorite animal? A hippo.
Why a hippo? Because they are big and cool.
Is there something you need to tell me or want to tell me? Nope.
Are you a republican or a democrat? I don’t know.
Who’s going to be the next president? I don’t care.
Do you like George Bush? Ouch (spilled hot tea on leg.) Yes.
What’s your favorite movie, ever. I haven’t seen Meet the Spartans yet. The Spongebob Movie.
What your favorite meal? Breakfast. Bacon, eggs, sausage, little cute biscuits, and that’s it.
You don’t want to go to IHOP for your birthday? Shakes head no. (we’re going to TGI Fridays)
When you’re a rich and famous football player, what is the first present you’re going to buy me? 50th Anniversary Corvette.
And that’s why he’s my favorite.

Monday Night Bible Study. Part Deux.

Four of our Monday Night Bible Study Home Girls are also part of this group. We had been getting together for the last couple of years for prayer time, bible study, fellowship, life-sharing. Last year, I felt God was leading me to take back that weekly time for my family. Thankfully, we all attend the same church and see each other still. We speak on the phone and now and then all get together. These four women are still meeting on Tuesday mornings. I miss that time with them. But I know that, for a time at least, I had to stop meeting with them each week.

I have spoken about them before. But I want to touch upon each of them today.

One of these sweet women is from West Virginia. Now, I love West Virginia. It IS Wild and Wonderful and beautiful. Unfortunately, WV has gotten a bad rap and some folks like to jokingly tease our sweet West Virginian about her home state. I, of course, am not one of them. She takes the ribbing very well and even makes her own comments about WV. She has such a wonderful heart. Raised mostly in foster care, she is giving back and has foster children of her own. Her life can be described as wild and wonderful. And not just a little stressful at times.

Another of my sweet friends is pregnant with her long-awaited, much-anticipated second child. A boy child to make her family complete. Of all of us, the Pregnant One is probably the most sensitive to the lost. She has a heart and God-given desire to reach those that don’t know Jesus. And God has placed her in places where He is able to use that desire. I am often astounded by her ability and heart in this area of ministry God has called her to. She is truly following God’s call on her life.

One of these lovely women came into my life (and the rest of ours) at a time of great need in her life. For whatever reason, she was going through a period in the desert and spent a lot of time in her home. Recognizing it for what it was…a time in the desert…she turned to God for guidance. Comfort. Peace. And to us. For encouragement. Fellowship. Food. (It’s ALWAYS about the food.) She has since left this desert place and doesn’t hesitate to share what God did for her during and now after her time there. She is also our can-do girl…give her a paperclip, some duct tape and a pencil and she can make or fix anything.

The last, but definitely NOT least, of these bff’s of mine, came to our church already one of us. She was the dear friend of another church member and from the time we first heard about her coming until she and her military husband and family arrived…she had already become assimilated. We never gave her the option nor the opportunity to even look at another church…and her husband finally gave up, threw in the towel and they all joined our church membership. I feel as if I have always known her, although it’s only been a few short years. She has an incredible voice. She is the VBS Queen. There is talk of her leaving Virginia this summer. But I’m ignoring it. Not happening. Can’t happen. Won’t allow it.

So there you have a bit more info on the Amazing Women I do this bible study thing/life thing with.

NOT that any one of them was upset that they weren’t written about the first go around. Nope. Not a one.

(You know who you are.)

Monday Night Bible Study.

I was having my quiet time yesterday morning, praying through my prayer list, and my thoughts touched upon each of my Bible Study Home Girls. This is the group of women I have been doing bible study with for the past couple of years. We meet Monday nights at 7:00. As my thoughts touched on each one, I realized what a blessing they are to me. They are, in the typical way a group of women tends to be, eclectic. A huge range of ages, professions, religious backgrounds and personalities. I wanted to share a photo of some of them with you. Although four or five of our regular girls are missing.

One of these women I have known for 13 years. We met at the corner where our streets connect on the first day we both put our first child on the kindergarten bus. I was 6 months pregnant with our youngest, her youngest was 8 months old (they are now best buds). She has three boys. I bow to her regularly in unworthiness. She and I were both raised in the Episcopal church. Going Southern Baptist has been challenging, but rewarding, for both of us.

Another woman is Australian. A chaplain’s wife. I love her Aussie accent. Especially when she reads, because, as she tells me frequently, “I learned to read in Australian.” She now leads our Women’s Ministry. She is so down to earth and I adore her.

One of us attends a Catholic Church. But has been coming to our Beth Moore bible studies all along. She challenges each of us in our spiritual thinking and walk. She has had me thinking all last night and today with this question, “But God protects and loves the Jews who are not Messianic, right?” After all…they are God’s Chosen. We talked about the Remnant. We talked about the way to the Father is through the Son. But what about God’s Chosen? And also, how do we know that when a Muslim prays to Allah, he isn’t praying to the One True God? I know that we challenge her, too. That’s what it is about. Our bible study would NOT be the same without her.

These are just a couple examples of the wonderful group of women I share a passion for Christ with. Most of them were surprised to hear I had a blog and, like our Pastor, questioned my trust that the women I blog with are, in fact, who and what they say they are. We did have a lively discussion about blogging and the Internet last night. Not surprising since our ages range from 35-60 (give or take a year and not that you would even imagine any of us are that old!).

For some reason, I have withheld my blog from the majority of this group. It is not that I am hesitant in sharing my thoughts and heart with them. They certainly know I do during bible study and at other times we are together. I’m not really sure why I haven’t. A couple of the women do read my blog and have from the very beginning. I met with them for another bible study on Tuesday mornings for a couple of years and when I felt I needed to take that time back for my family and all that was/is going on with them, I still needed a way to connect with them and had hoped my blog would do that.

So…here we are. Out in the open. I’m sending them all an e-mail inviting them to check out my blog and the picture The Man took of us last night…

After a Healthy Day of Eating…

What can drive a 46.9 year old woman to devour this in 10 minutes flat?

A day spent at her daughter’s volleyball tournament, that’s what. I’m not sure what was more difficult…watching an extremely talented team of girls self-destruct or have to listen to the parents around me commenting on the self-destruction.

The only good side to the entire event was that I’m home at 6:30 instead of 9:00. Since we didn’t even make it into the playoffs.

Maybe tomorrow I’ll post some pics from the tournament but right now…I just want to wash my face, put my flannel jammies on and veg.

This Girl, Out.

Here She is…Miss Millie.

Isn’t she pretty?

Here she is on the wall…notice the princess crown hanging on my dresser mirror? Yup. Me…totally a Princess. My bff’s gave me that.

Also notice the yucky color of the door frame. We have lived with that yucky color the entire 14 years we have lived in this house. Don’t get me started on my husband and painting. He hates to do it. But we’re painting and redoing our bedroom this year. Woo-hoo! After all, Miss Millie shouldn’t have to live with the yuckiness.
Thank you again, Joanne! I love Miss Millie!